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There are two people in your life
who will always be a part of you every day,
wherever you go, whatever you do-
one of those people is your father, your Dad,
your hero, your strength, the one who will protect you,
defend you, work hard for you all his life;
and the other is your Mother, your Mum,
the first vision of beauty and perfection you ever saw,
and if you are as lucky as me
the kindest, the most caring, the most wonderful,
and the most amazing woman, and role-model,
you will ever be lucky to meet or ever know.
Our parents are the reason we are even alive
and kicking in the first place,
and if it were not for them we would literally
never have been born;
our parents saw our first moment, our first blink,
our first smile, our first adventure into unexplored territory
when we first set out on our own,
even if at first it was merely an exuberant crawl.
Our Mothers always know us better than we know ourselves;
our Mothers always want the best for us;
our Mothers always have an instinct
about what the next thing is going to be to come out of our mouths;
our Mothers always know all the names of the trees in our forest.
The best Mothers in the world would walk over hot coals for their children;
the best Mothers in the world would, and do, sacrifice anything
and everything else for their treasured offspring;
the best Mothers in the world would lay down their life for their child
in front of an oncoming train;
the best Mothers in the world would consider, and do consider,
the life and the happiness of their family their top-priority,
and they embrace every second of being a Mother,
and they love all the joy that honour, privilege, and gift, brings.
My Mum is smart, beautiful, fantastic, and true of heart;
my Mum is vibrant, special, funny, amazing, and unlike anyone;
my Mum is my soul, my friend, my conscience,
and she will be forever as she has been from the start.
My Mum is the greatest Mother, because she is always caring for others
like she always has her entire life,
and I am so lucky to be her son,
and I am the luckiest man in the world
that my Mother is my Mum.
Silence. A pause. A full-stop.
A time to think and see.
A natural and needed interruption,
a resonant song-lyric,
a breath-taking moment,
an opportunity to not have to worry about anything
and simply be.
We all need a break sometimes-
even the best play has an intermission.
We all need to stop and look outside at dusk
and watch the luminous lightning-bugs and fireflies,
and hear the sound of the crickets chirping.
It can be a truly beautiful time,
especially when you have had a lot on you mind recently,
and you want to let all your pent-up feelings and emotions go-
that time when you are looking up at the twilight sky
and you know and you see the universe is telling you something
that it wants you to hear, and you need to hear-
that is the time when you can leave the front door of you open
for the stale air to leave and to let the fresh air come in
and clear your mind and vision, to see things come in
and go out of your life with every breath that you take,
and with every gust that the wind blows.
It can feel cold for a while
while you catch your breath and you breathe in deep,
it can be one of the few moments in your life
when you can actually feel truly free.
Sometimes you don’t know you need someone in your life
until you meet them and they fill your life, days, and hours,
with every part of them;
sometimes you don’t know how much you need something in your life
until you feel like you can’t live without it ever again.
Sometimes you don’t know a road you have been traveling on for years
until you break down on it and you stop and see its scenery
up-close and unexpectedly;
sometimes you don’t know your own self
until you look in the mirror and you ask yourself ‘Who am I?’,
sometimes you have to act selfishly, but not hurtfully-
single-mindedly, but not unashamedly.
Sometimes you have to live the life you want to live
rather than the life others would have you live,
so that even a tear can be a smile of happiness from your eye.
Life is about finding peace.
Life is about finding balance.
Life is about acting on things when you are sure about them,
and about using every ounce of emotion- including fear.
Life is about making the most of everything,
exposing yourself to as much as you can,
and letting your heart, mind, soul, run free of any leash.
Life is about taking every chance.
Life is about… that!
Out the door I see Eden,
out the door I see hope,
out the door I see new possibilities,
out the door I see a beautiful day
bathed in the light of the sun,
out the door I see a direction to go,
out the door I see a mystery, a world,
a people, a life, that never stops fascinating me.
Out the door I see a new adventure,
out the door I see the future and the past,
out the door I see breathtaking nature,
out the door I see a play being played out
before my eyes with an infinite cast.
Out the door I see light,
out the door I see lions,
out the door I see flags
and clouds being blown in the wind,
out the door I see colour of all depths of the spectrum,
out the door I see all that is bright, magnetic,
connected, built, maintained, keeps going,
stays standing, through everything;
out the door I see reality, as if I am seeing it through
a mirror of one-way glass, or as if through the eye
and the vortex and event horizon of a wormhole,
and I imagine that every atom, molecule, energy,
person, building, animal, plant, and thing,
is constantly talking to each other
without them even knowing it,
on another level and frequency of communication.
Out the door I see people I have never seen before
and will probably never see again;
out the door I see history, fate, destiny;
out the door I see heritage, culture,
the beginning of spring-
the change of a season;
out the door I see choice and preference,
joy, and shadow;
out the door I see things that will exist and have existed
for each and every millennium;
out the door I see a world that can be testing at times,
but over all just wants to be friendly;
out the door I see where I must go.
Out the door I see and I think of what is out there for me,
and what would someone think of me if they saw me
while they were looking up and looking out,
and I wonder if anyone else somewhere
is looking through a similar opening
and considering the world they see
for how it feel and appears to them-
what is what it is, and what is in store.
I wonder where I am going
and I imagine someone behind me saying and asking
that same question of themselves and of me,
as they watch me get up and walk out the door.
I went out into the world today
with a new camera, a new outlook, a new focus-
the world felt like a light-blessed river
being sustained by a towering waterfall of rainbow rain,
sparkling mist, and beautiful lotuses.
There was something different about me,
about my surroundings, that I felt I could not ignore-
it wasn’t clear to me what had changed, at first,
but the minute that I turned everything off:
my phone, my life, my world, my hopes,
my dreams, my fears, my knowledge;
I realised that I knew nothing,
I realised that I had missed so much,
I realised that every moment of blessed silence-
when the only thing you can hear is your own heart-
is in itself an intergalactic door.
I captured and I became something new in that moment;
the windmill of life turned in the breeze- I became frozen,
I felt awestruck by a new truth that was echoing in every direction,
I was touched to tears by a new clarity
that cleared-away the cobwebs of my imagination-space
and exposed a new picture of reality to me
that felt natural, vast, free of pretense.
I looked at myself differently,
I looked at my life with new eyes through a new lens,
I became enamoured again by the faces and the memories
that I have saved my entire life of my family and my friends,
I saw the source of the divine and great muse of enlightenment
from where all thought stems.
This world, our collective meaning,
continues to amaze and inspire me.
If someone was to take a picture of everything that is happening
right now- every choice that someone made,
every thought that someone had-
what would that picture look like,
what would that picture make someone on the outside looking-in realise:
perhaps that they are in fact on the inside looking-out;
maybe such an image would change what it is about life
that means so much to you,
maybe such an image would enthral you,
maybe such an image would send you mad.
I felt like a lone lotus, bobbing up and down in a pond-
reawakened, exposed, open to the new tides of the future
and the new light of a new era;
I felt like I was beginning my life again,
with new depths to explore about the entire universe-
like the first photo of a new camera.
Snowflakes swirl, fly, and dance, in the air,
as they slowly descend to the already white-covered floor-
billions of intricate and perfect frozen tears
dusting and blanketing the world before me.
It is like standing in the middle of a snowglobe.
No one can see anything in front of them,
everyone just jeeps going as best, as fast,
and as caustiously, as they can-
not letting the weather keep them in one place,
not even this unrelenting snowfall.
Seeing familiar landmarks veiled below frozen fields
that makes everything look indistinguishable from everything else,
a new world reveals itself, a new light shines, a new beauty arises,
the sky becomes the Earth, the Earth becomes the sky;
the sun is obscurred from view, all is bright,
and suddenly every-day things that you may sometimes miss
start to catch your eye.
A red british postbox has never looked more amazing
and glowing than against a white back-drop;
roads and motorways have never seemed more ghostly,
nor more other-worldly, than when you drive down them
in the middle of a blizzard,
when you are relying on the lights of the vehicles
in front of you to save you from coming to a sudden,
immediate, and perhaps costly stop.
Walking on what you cannot see,
walking on something that you have to constantly reteach yourself
how to walk on with every step,
makes you think more about your surroundings,
forces you to not take anything for granted,
and to expect the unexpected-
it doesn’t take much to take a false step in the snow below
and seconds later to find yourself in a skid.
In this weather you need to wrap-up warm, keep on the move,
stay dry, make the most of every shelter and cover that you come across,
don’t rush to wherever you are going, give yourself time, stay inside-
the snow can seem like a disruption if you have got somewhere to go;
but you cannot not appreciate its beauty, its magic,
its gift of contemplation-
nothing else opens your eyes to the world more wide.
Looking at the world, staring at the white cloud-covered sky,
at the snow-carpeted ground, and at the bare branches of the trees,
while wearing the biggest and the warmest coat that I could find
to protect me from the cold and the ice-
I look at where I am standing,
I look at the landscape that nature is remaking,
and I smile to myself at the thought that, as things stand right now,
this must be the most perfect winter wonderland that I have ever seen,
and it would be the most sublime snowman’s paradise.
It must have been something that I read;
it must have been something that I saw, or heard;
it must have been something that someone said;
it must have been something in the colour,
or in the sound of a word.
One minute I am staring at the vibrant red cover of a book,
and then, the next thing that I know, an entire hour has passed-
I am in shock, as if I have been hit by a truck.
I felt like I had been newly thawed-out
after having been frozen in time-
I cannot account for anything that happened in that lost hour;
however, everywhere that I looked now,
everything of the colour red instantly jumped out at me,
more so than before, as if it were by design.
Buses, telephone boxes, post boxes, the Union Flags red crosses-
everywhere that I went, every shade of red was in sight and in my head:
from the crimson curls of a beautiful woman’s hair,
to the attention-seeking red light at some traffic lights
telling me to stop up-ahead.
Cars, clothing, flowers, insects-
a Porsche racing passed me; a man wearing a British Heart foundation t-shirt;
the roses in someone’s garden; the ladybird that landed on my nose-
everything that could be red was red,
from the largest to the smallest of things and objects.
I do not know what was so special about the day,
nor why red of all the colours of the rainbow
chose to brighten the colour of my blood for those few hours-
maybe I looked too close at the pictures of Venus’ transit across the sun,
or maybe my mind needed that gift of a powerful colour
to make me forget about the grey clouds and the showers.
I am sure that I once read that there are some people
who believe that the universe is colour-coded;
I personally do not know for sure, but I do believe
that colour can compel us, on occasion, to see, feel,
and act in a certain way- like the tightening, or the loosening, of a thread-
that is what happened to me:
one moment I am seeing stars,
and the next I am seeing red.
-
Through the forest; through the trees;
through an opening, to a cornfield;
there, standing tall in the distance, my talisman is revealed.
The instant I see it I immediately race towards it at full-speed-
ever-present and all-around me there is an energy,
an anticipation, a focus, and a need.
The windmill is all that I see; the windmill is all that I know;
not even the waist-high corn of this field
can keep me from where I want to go.
I am like a man possessed: running, leaping,
forging a path where before there was none-
the closer I get, the faster I run;
the higher it towers, the more hypnotized by it I become.
The Windmill, the tower: a majestic memento of ingenuity,
and symbiosis.
A windmill, an artefact: a constant, akin to that of an oasis.
As I stand at the windmills base
looking up at it’s intricate sails,
the windmill’s wheel begins to spin,
as if it were being turned by the gust of a gale.
The clouds above me clear; the windmill’s sails are now still;
the blue sky above me looks so inviting;
I feel as if I am in the presence of an ethereal will.
I stand transfixed; energized, emotional,
protective of what stands before me;
and after what seems like a lifetime of looking, I finally see…
myself, my younger self,
standing at the base of the windmill looking at me from below-
as if I were now the windmill,
and my younger self had come to say hello.
Sometimes we all need to take a step back,
to truly see all the Playing Cards that are in the pack;
to truly see the world as it is, and how it is meant to be seen;
to truly see all that exists on the periphery, as well as in between.
Sometimes we all need to take a step back,
to truly see ‘white’ where once we only saw ‘black’;
to truly see the truth for the first time,
to truly see the reason at the exact instant that we see the rhyme.
Sometimes we all need to take a step back,
to truly see all that came before, and to get back on track;
to truly see who we are, and what out lives have become;
to truly see the vibrations, as well as hear the sound of the drum.
Sometimes we all need to take a step back,
to truly see the consequences of our actions, as if reading them in an almanac;
to truly see a work of art, and fully appreciate it from the distance intended;
to truly see everything that the landscape now permits to be comprehended.
Sometimes we all need to take a step back,
to truly see all the signs of the universe, and not just those twelve of the zodiac;
to truly see love, life, compassion, and connectivity;
to truly see the invisible, the indivisible; and experience the wonder of curiosity.
natura abhorret a vacuo
The Life, the Light, the Tears, of the Poet of the Sphere 