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If I knew that today was my last day on Earth,
if I could feel and see the last strength
and the last light of me flickering,
if I could feel my spirit getting ready to leave my body
and journey to the stars,
then I would go to the one place in this world I have always wanted to go,
with the one person who I love with the power of a curse,
and we would do something that would be my life’s defining memory,
and it would be so amazing-
not only would I cry from my eyes,
but I would weep from my soul, from my dreams,
from the final breaths being expelled from my lungs,
as all I could hear over everything else
was the beat of my heart.

If this was my last chance to do anything;
if this was my last chance to say anything;
if this was my last moment to think something,
to feel something, to want something, to have something,
I would outstretch my fingers and take hold
of the hand of the one right besides me,
and I would look into their eyes and I would sing.

If my face was being touched by the sun for the last time, I would cry;
if my lips were being kissed by perfection I would smile,
and I would truly be content to close my eyes
and let go of gravity for the first time, for the last time,
and have the means and the gift to fly.

If the time of my life were to be ending;
if the finish-line were to be fast-approaching;
if I knew the one thing that was ultimately
the most important truth worth knowing;
not being able to stay and continue to live
and experience more would hurt more than anything-
because that is the fight that we all one day lose,
because we simply cannot keep fighting.

I really do wish that I could life forever,
but I also wish that everyone else too could go on
and live alongside me and with me for all eternity;
I wish I had a heart and a body
that would never give out-
sometimes I imagine that I am looking back at myself
with eyes that have seen infinity,
and I imagine that I hear myself say,
and especially at the moment that the curtain closes on me
for the final time: enjoy the all of the now.

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How could you just throw it all away?
Just because things didn’t end up the way you wanted them to.
I know that you still miss them.
I know that you still think about them
at times of quiet and solitude throughout the day.
You fell in love with them with all your heart.
How could you have known,
would the thought have even crossed your mind,
that they were not in love with you.

The moment that you walked out you tarnished something pristine.
The moment that you left you tore-up
all the pages that you shared together,
leaving nothing but fragments of a special and treasured time
strewn on the ground and blown-away by the wind-
never to be as they were again.

If you could go back in time,
would you change anything that happened?
Even the times when you felt in the dark
as to how they felt about you?

Things are always better at the beginning.
There is always so much innocence, mystery, joy,
celebration of the familiar and the unfamiliar,
and the things that you have in common.
By the time you realise that you love someone it is already too late.
I wouldn’t have had it any other way,
and if I had to do it all again I wouldn’t change a thing.

A lot has happened. A lot has changed.
They have changed. You have changed.
There was a time when what you said to each-other meant everything,
there was a time when the possibility of being in the same room
made you feel nervous, happy, excited-
a short time together, for which you would give anything.

I know you feel guilty for ending your relationship with them.
I know you feel that she ended her relationship with you a long time ago.
I know that on more than one occasion you have tried to reach-out,
in one way or another, to tell her how you feel about her.
I know, and you know, that she would never mean to hurt you,
or anyone, in any way-
she probably cares about you, and what you have done for her,
more than you will ever know.

Just give it some time.
Just keep caring about her in your own way.
Just keep thinking about her,
and keep hoping, as you always have, that she is happy, content, loved.

I know you miss her,
but what you really miss about her is the dream of her-
the first image of her that you ever saw,
the first things that she said to you
that made you fall in love with her.

The world is a big place.
The universe is vast and complicated.
Every time you close your eyes you picture her face.
One day these words will mean something more to you,
when you’re ready.
Don’t forget all that she meant to you,
all that she will always mean to you.
The love. The smiles.
The distance. The heart-break. The end.

Everything is fated.

Our mind, our spirit, our consciousness, our soul-
everything about us that is the most important thing about us,
that is not of the body,
that is the most phenomenal thing about every human being,
that is deeper than any ocean anywhere on any planet,
and is the adhesive that holds together the whole.

Our essence extends beyond us.
Our mind never stops working.
While our body is resting, regenerating,
after being used to excess,
our mind interprets the messages that we have received,
but not clearly perceived, from the world around us-
a process that we can sometimes witness the progress of
while we are dreaming.

When a baby is born,
when a child first cries-out
and first extends the reach of their life-force and touches the heart
and connects with the consciousness of their parents,
the moment is so magnificent, overwhelming, and enticing-
it is as magnetic as the Earth’s core,
and as beautiful as the song of Angels.

When a body breathes its last breath,
and enacts its last deed;
when a body reaches its last instant of usefulness before death,
and you feel the sensation of being new-born again and free-
at that moment you need nothing,
at that moment you hear nothing,
at that moment your entire life unfolds before you
and reveals the meaning of your life
and why you were so integral in keeping the universe expanding,
keeping the galaxy spinning, and keeping the world as diverse,
engaging, and wonderfully-unpredictable,
as it has always been since its beginning.

People never truly die.
When we die, I believe that all that we are, all that we ever were,
and all that we forever will be, goes on-
and as we shed our mortal shackles,
as we take our final look at a sunrise or a sunset,
we understand what it all means:
why people in our life mean so much to us,
and why acceptance and realization is life’s key-
that is when all existence comes into focus,
and we understand that we are celestial beings in our natural form
of many states of reality that are not of the body.

I never dreamed that I would meet someone like you,
I never imagined that I would be inspired to write the rhymes that I have penned;
I wish things were different between me and you;
but I don’t regret a thing-
this is the beginning, just as it is the end.

Who I am now is a universe away from who I was-
we all change over time, everyone does;
but after I first saw you,
all I saw, and all I wanted to see,
was your face-
because the moment that I saw you
was a powerful and a life-changing moment for me-
the walls of the world became doors to other places,
as the light that now surrounded the world
spoke the inspiration that would become my poetry,
and connected me forever to everything that the universe is, and never erases.
What I didn’t know then, which I know now,
is that the closer that I thought we were getting,
the further away from one another we always were-
and now that I know the truth, things are different between us,
every poem has become one poem, and the future is now a blur.

This is goodbye,
this is the end,
this is our epilogue,
this is our finale;
this isn’t to say that we wont ever see each other again,
but fate has its own plans for us both, and what will be,
we both will just have to wait and see.

Goodbye

It’s gone! It’s abandoned me!
A cloud has amassed, a fog has engulfed me.
My spark of inspiration has been extinguished,
the aura of life has lost its glow;
my identity, my imagination, my world is close to death-
I am in-between realities, I am in limbo.

Silence is now the language of my thoughts,
my life’s purpose is stuck in a fugue;
I feel like my entire universe has ended, void- and I am alone, solitary, nude.

The poetry of the galaxy used to be my natural tongue,
the rhyme and the reason of things was my field of view;
but now I can’t tell up from down, beauty from emptiness,
what is false from what is true.
My greatest fear has been realized, I have fallen from grace;
I feel as if I am floating free of anchor in an un-star-spangled space.

I read, I watch, I talk, and I listen;
I stare at a computer screen, and at a white sheet of paper;
but when I try to write something, I feel like my muse and my mind is in prison.

This is the end. I have failed. My days have ran out, like the sands of time.
No more poems. No more poetry. No more inspiration. No more rhyme.

Then I see it. Then the sun rises.
The explosion of creation; the messenger, known by many guises
arrives, as it has has done so many times before,
with a gift of hope- the key to an ever-present, but unseen door-
and also with an answer as to why I am here;
why we are sometimes overflowing with inspiration and new ideas;
and why it is important to truly embrace joy, and to shed a tear.

I feel like I am myself again.
I feel like the veil of uncertainty has lifted.
I feel like I am ready to live and write the poetry of my life,
and to share the love and the purpose that I have been gifted.

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